Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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