i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I think my moral compass just broke
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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