I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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