So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
