I can text with my tongue
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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