I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
