So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize