I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
