Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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