But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
hotel room ftw
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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