i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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