Someone shit on the floor
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize