Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
