i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
