Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
