Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
