Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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