Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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