She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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