You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
i came on her dog
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
