piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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