i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
please don't ironically join a cult
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