she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm at about main and main street
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
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