Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
and you fell through a lawn chair
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize