it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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