At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
