Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
