i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
