Sponge bath it is.
my phone needs a breathalizer
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
