dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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