it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
