she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
