Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
NoShamevember. You game?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
