walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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