And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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