I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize