That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
My penis needs a shock collar
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize