i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
