Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Randomize
