gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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