Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
