You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize