Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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