I hate all girls vehemently.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
i believe in u and ur pee
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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