We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
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