I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize