so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
