Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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