I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
