WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
